Today I feel compelled to write two posts. Technically I could fit everything in one, but I feel the subjects just don't mesh. They each need their own fifteen minutes of fame. And so here we are, post one of two.
I would like to thank God for reminding me today that destiny waits for no man, or in my case, woman. Over the last week my mild case of the common cold has completely demolished my self-motivation. Wallowing in my own pity for five days has finally caught up with me, and yesterday I couldn't even make myself take a shower. I just moped all day. And I do mean ALL day. I did not accomplish a single household chore, and dinner, while delicious, was a freezer -> oven -> plate ordeal into which I put roughly -2 effort.
Today I woke up feeling almost entirely back to normal. And yet still not at all motivated to put my home back in order. And lets face it, keeping an orderly home at this juncture is a very large part of my destiny. So today I've been consulting my bag of procrastination tools, and putting off cleaning as long as I could.
I use a system of index cards to track the chores that are on my to-do list for the day. It's a sort of living to-do list that rotates daily. It is a wonderful system that works remarkably well for me. It keeps my home looking like something from a Better Homes and Gardens photo shoot about 90% of the time. However, when I break the routine the cards can pile up quickly. My first procrastination was to take out all of the cards I've neglected since last Wednesday and lay them on the dining room table. Let me tell you, there are a lot. Seeing them laid out and staring at me in all of their unfinished glory did not inspire me to be productive. Actually, it just made me feel even more determined not to do anything. I managed to appease my guilt by folding one load of laundry (which is no feat since there are still 3 that are already washed and dried, and another two worth of dirty laundry that I've let pile up). Then I convinced myself I was feeling run down, and not to push myself too hard lest my weakened immune system take a turn for the worse. So I took a short break, and then tackled my next big feat, the sink full of dishes. After five minutes of laboriously loading the dishwasher I deemed I was ready for another break, and lunch.
To satisfy my craving for something rich and sweet I brewed myself up a pot of delicious chocolate hazelnut coffee. It's my new daily indulgence. I like a little coffee with my cream and sugar, so I went to the fridge to retrieve the all-important CoffeeMate. As I lifted the bottle from the fridge door I gave it the routine two quick shakes just to froth it up a bit and wouldn't you know, the cap was open. Not completely open, no, that would have been too obvious. It just wasn't clicked completely closed. Of course little drops of non-fat French Vanilla went everywhere. Inside the fridge, on the floor, down the mustard and salad dressing bottles. Everywhere.
With a sigh, a very loud somewhat annoyed sigh, I started cleaning up the mess. As I was debating whether I should clean up the mess on the floor or just call the dogs into the kitchen it dawned on me: this was not another mess to make me feel overwhelmed. This was just God, with His ever-changing sense of humor reminding me that procrastinating isn't just going to leave me with a messy house at the end of the day; it's going to keep my destiny from advancing one more step. The realization almost made me smile. Almost. I was at a smirk, and on my way to smiling when I bent down to paper-towel up the mess from the kitchen floor. Yeah, the situation there is not anything to smile about. Yuck!
As I finished mopping up the majority of the mess at the fridge, and then the mess that had dripped down the bottle and onto the countertop I realized that being at home, like any other job, is still work. There are days that I am so thankful to be at home and days that I think back on the corporate world and I rejoice that my destiny doesn't lead me there. But, there are still days when I think my boss is a jerk (which leads to some very interesting introspection) and days when I wish the weekend would just hurry up and arrive so I could take a break.
It's refreshing in a way, to have a day where doing nothing is not really an option. It reminds me not to take this life for granted. Not to get too relaxed and forget that living this destiny is a blessing, but being a blessing doesn't mean that it is effortless. So now, after stopping by to record this little epiphany I'm off to finish up my chores. If I can manage them before the husband gets home I'll be back for part two of two.
And part two of two is great! Trust me :)